blog #14

     Based on the two articles that I read, the results section is devoted to explaining what happened during the research.  This is where the writer tells about his or her findings.  This is the section of the paper that may include graphs and charts and other visuals that help relate the information.  The article that Marlen assigned us said that one of the most common errors is to be repetitive and go over the same findings over and over.  That is my biggest concern about this part of the paper, however, I’m not really writing one because I’m writing the 40 page novella.

    The discussion section relates what the research found to what is already available on the topic.  I think of it as a discussion between the researchers themselves.  What was different and what was similar to other available research is included.  In Marlen’s article, it suggests that a writer talk about how his findings either back up or disprove the original hypothesis.  This is also a place for authors to disagree or agree with what other researchers have found.  Basically, the discussions section is devoted to seeing how what you came up with relates to almost everything else that the writer did in the process.

    Marlen’s article says, “your conclusion can provide a bridge to help your readers make the transition back to their daily lives.”  The function of the conclusion is to wrap up the entire paper.  The author needs to answer his or her research question and tie up loose ends in the process so that the reader can walk away from the paper and have a complete understanding of the topic, instead of walking away unsure about what they read.  It’s the author’s chance to give a few last words. Marlen’s article also said that the conclusion is a way to make the reader glad they ahve spent the time reading the paper. The author should wrap it up in a way that lets people walk away from the paper feeling complete.

Peer response rubric

CRITERIA	5	4	3	2	1	0	Comments
1. Effectiveness of research.	x						I think the research is awesome.  I like that you’re going to have people actually golfing.
2. Creates a story for the reader		x					good.  it’s an interesting topic
3. Speaking to the intended audience	x						You do a nice job.  You define terms that need to be addressed, and use common understandable language.  quotes pros of the sport, which speaks to golfers.
4. Introduction		x					I think the hook comes in a little late and could be moved up to the beginning.  but it works great as is.
5. Formatting	x						looks great!

Blog #13

    I have catered my writing for my audience I think by defining all the things I need to define.  I bet a lot of my readers will not know what Straight Edge is so it is necessary to define things like that so that my readers will understand the rest of my paper.  I also used language that is familiar to younger readers, as my paper is geared more toward a youthful audience.  But once I combined my papers I noticed that I really need to work on my transitions from section to section.

Blog #12

    My research subject will be one person, my friend Cory.  I plan on having Cory write a few pages on his experience with claiming Straight Edge.  As Mareln put it in a meeting i had with him; “He is, you aren’t”.  With that in mind, I thought it best to have his write down an account of his personal experience so that I can learn from it.  One of the problems with my methodological approach is the volunteer effect.  My research subject is my best friend.  He most likely feels some sort of obligation to me, and would like to see me do well on my research assignment.  That may effect the results of my research.  My one question about research methods is what makes a method seem reliable.  How can I make sure my research is reliable and trustworthy?

Blog #11

    The article that I went out and found was titled, “How to write a method section”, by Kendra Cherry.  Both the article that was assigned, and the article that I found on my own were about writing a methods paper.  This section of the paper contains the methodology amongst other things.  For my paper my methodology would just a specific, detailed case study.  I would need to get specific about why I used the methodology I did as opposed to any other methodology.  So, for my paper I am using a personal case study because I know that I will be able to tell a more interesting and personal story if I do it that way.  I would also include my the procedures I followed while I carried out my methodology.

Blog #10

CRITERIA	5	4	3	2	1	0	Comments
1. Effectiveness of research.		x					The research is solid, but the author only references the NYT and a few movies.
2. Creates a story for the reader	x						Several case studies that provide interesting stories for the reader.
3. Speaking to the intended audience	x						Used familiar language and humor, which is fair for an audience of blog readers.
4. Introduction		x					Starts off with a startling story that hooks the reader in.
TOTAL = 18/20	Add’l comments:						Nice job Peter Turchin!

　

Blog #9

    The first article that I am chosing to close read is “Beyond the Wall of Separation”, which is about the separation of church and state in America.  In the first paragraph McCarthy tells the reader that public schools hae been the setting for many disputes over separation of church and state.  Next she writes about the history of the separation of church and state in America and about the constitutional amendments.  In the next paragraph she raises the example of a specific legal case between an Amish family and Wisconsin public schools.  Next she writes about how prayer and devotional time was taken out of public schools in 1960 because it went against the first amendment.  McCarthy presents the metaphor of a wall separating church and state and uses more examples to support her claim.

    In the lit review, she writes about the case study of Lee vs. Weisman.  In the next paragraph McCarthy writes about student’s right to express themselves, and how that conflicts with the separation of church and state.  In the next paragraph McCarthy gives credit for the metaphor to Thomas Jefferson.  In the next paragraph, McCarthy raises the idea of allowing students to vote for their right lead prayers in schools, however she concludes the paragraph by saying that such an idea wouldn’t work.  McCarthy writes that since the government protects our right to free speech, students should be able to speak their minds on religion. 

    McCarthy writes that school children are can be captivated easily and lead to believe things that their teacher believes, so it is particularly important to recognize that when dealing with matters of religious expression in school atmosphere.  Next she writes that many believe that any time spent in silent meditation could be conceived as time for prayer, but no law has been created to stop it because educators say that silent meditation is a good way to manage students.  In the next paragraph she writes about the pledge of allegiance, and how it is controversial in schools.  Then she writes about how parents have suggested that parts of the curriculum degrade christianity and promote atheistic ideas.  She brings up the idea of the origin of humanity, and writes about how there are different styles to teach.  Then McCarthy writes about how student’s work is sometimes censored so that the school is not endorsing a particular religion.  Then she writes about the issue of students opposing religious belief and their right to express themselves regardless of the conflict that may be created.

    In the next section, McCarthy writes about the need for certain protocols to be set in place for challenging curriculum before everything goes to hell when a parent gets mad.  In the next paragraphy, McCarthy argues for the need for instructors to discuss the issues that go along with the first amendment, rather than shy away from them.  Next she suggests that students be let out of school early once a week so that they can all practice religious activities in their own ways without discriminating against anyone.  She concludes by writing that a students religious life should not be shut out, and that religion is an important part of most student’s lives.

McCarthy, Martha. “Beyond the Wall of Separation: Church-State Concerns in Public Schools.” Phi Delta Kappan 90.10 (2009): 714-19.

    The second article that I close read was Teaching religion in America’s public schools.  Passe and Willox start the paper by hooking in the reader.  Next they write that being educated about religion is essential to understanding social issues.  Next they write that the problem isn’t getting religion into the curriculum, but getting to the teachers to teach it.  Furthermore they write that Christianity is already everywhere in the classroom, as made evident by christmas decorations and things like that.  Next they write that it is important to teach religion, without proselytizing the students.

    In the next section of the paper they write about the clear distinction between church and state.  They write that students should be taught not only about their own religion, but the religion of others.  They dedicate the next paragraph to suggesting that not nly religion should be taught but also other elements of other cultures.  They write that 9/11 made everyone a little bit more aware of the fact that they know nothing of Islam for example.  Despite steps toward fixing the problem, they write that little is being done in schools.

    In the first paragraph of the next section the authors write about the policies that need to be changed to teach American’s about other cultures and religions.  The next paragraph is about the need for the American people to want to change and learn about other religions.  The next paragraph tells about how teachers lack an informational foundation to teach religion.  The next paragraph is an addition to the preceeding one, and it states that teacher also lack the teaching techniques to teach that material.  Next they write about how teachers shouldn’t be teaching religion right now, because it wouldn’t be possible.  In the following paragraph, the authors address the need for teachers, the administration, and the community to work in unison to change.  To conclude the section, the authors write that there are already all the necessary supplies to accomplish the change, just not the necessary demand. 

   In the first paragraph of the conclusion the authors write that with a campaign to raise awareness for religious studies in school, American students could be more globally competitive.

Passe, Jeff, and Lara Willox. “Teaching Religion in America’s Public Schools: A Necessary Disruption.” Social Studies 100.3 (2009): 102-06.

    The introduction and the lit review are different because the introduction makes an attempt to hook the reader in and let them know what the paper is about and a lit review is about the information that the author gathered during his or her research.  Both authors attempted to hook the reader with an appeal to logic.  They both started off with ideas that seemed so common sense.  McCarthy’s article aimed to define the idea of separation of church and state and give a suspicious look at it.  It’s significant because the constitution states that there is to be a separation of church and state and if there is research to prove that there isn’t one than that would be important.  The methods used to find the results are found in the second paragraph of my outline, under the lit. review section.  Passe and Willox’s article aimed to defend the idea that religion should be taught in public schools.  It’s significant because if the papers assumption that learning other religions would benefit students then that is something that educators should investigate.